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You can lay poolside without fear of the male archetypal scoop-and-throw into the water. All those guilty pleasures you like to indulge in (we’re looking at you, )? You can take as long as you want to get ready to go out without worrying about him sitting there waiting for you, meaning it’s perfectly OK to reenact Taylor Swift’s “You Belong With Me” music video over, and over, and over... No worries about what he’s in the mood to eat, the choice is ! Nothing attracts Facebook comments from forgotten man candy like a recently posted “Single” relationship status. Aaron Samuels” all over your notebook à la middle school. There won’t be any unnecessary jealously about you hanging out with your guy friends.

I tell myself I want him to be happy and meet the right girl, but when he’s dating I get confused about my feelings.

Your eight-hour solo shopping spree is not going to push anyone to the brink of madness, like it would if you had a boyfriend in tow. “Shit Single Girls Say” exists for your viewing entertainment, and it’s satisfying knowing that somewhere out there, a fabulous gay man understands you. You never have to watch him and his friends play video games for hours on end.

No one is there to witness the ghastly sight of you wearing your glasses and retainer to bed.

As a single gal, there are times when it’s difficult to see the perks of your boyfriend-less lifestyle (for example, that time when you made the poor choice to see the latest Nicholas Sparks book-turned-movie and began to forget all the perfectly legitimate reasons you broke up with your ex). Let this list remind you of all the perks of being a Beyoncé-certified single lady; you’ll be back to reveling in your independence in no time and loving life in the land of the singles. You can spend the entire day watching Bravo television without anyone complaining about it. You never have to choose between hanging out with him or your friends. It’s one less person you have to buy holiday and birthday presents for. No one is going to yell at you for hogging the bed. There are endless opportunities for you to partake in a random dance floor make-out. The only person who will experience your bad morning breath is you. You can rest assured that you’re not the dreaded “boyfriend girl.” You know, that girl that can’t not be in a relationship.

You won’t feel guilty about feasting your eyes upon the hot shirtless men at the gym. There’s no one holding you back from studying abroad. If you want to watch ABC Family’s Saturday night double feature of while sobbing into your bowl of ice cream, you can.

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